I was talking to a mum at my son’s school and she was in tears. She was telling me that her son was getting bullied at school. This usually causes anxiety and pain for the children exposed to bullying, and the effects on parents can be heartbreaking. She had tears running down her face. He was punched in the stomach but another child. Punched in the stomach. What?! This poor kid is 8! He did nothing in retaliation. He does martial arts and didn’t give it too much thought. It didn’t break his spirit. He wasn’t in tears because he knows how to defend himself if he needed to, he didn’t feel it was necessary and rather responded with calmness and his voice. Staying calm in the midst of a difficult situation is tough for many, especially kids and teens. You can help your kids become less reactive by doing martial arts and self defence. As a parent listening to your children will give them a quiet confidence, that isn’t loud and obnoxious. They will learn to not live with a victim mentality.
Truth is, bullying in our society is an epidemic. Kids can be mean. They can be unkind. They can say words that hurt. And the worst part is bullying, it doesn’t stop at school. We deal with bullies in the work place, on the street, at the shopping mall. We live in a world where people are broken spirited. You’ve heard the saying, hurting people hurt others. But I absolutely believe bullies should do martial arts too. Why you might ask? So they can hurt people better or do more damage? No way!!! A bully is often insecure, with limited interpersonal skills, so they feel the need to throw their weight around physically, emotionally and mentally, abusing their victim to prove their worth and to establish to those around them that they are not inept. They show others their superiority, to build their weak ego. If their insecurity continues, these ‘bullies’ often dabble in drugs, and find ways of escaping their broken reality.
Going back to this lovely mumma, knowing her son can defend himself, gave her peace of mind. Seeing him not so sad about the bullying made it easier for her emotionally. He has built resilient! Thanks to martial arts. A true martial artist learns many skills, especially resilience. Because being on the mats requires mental toughness, and training the brain to become less reactive and less violent, because a person has faith in their abilities to be able to defend themselves. They have been in more challenging situations on the mats, in training self defence. Kids will learn to be less confrontational and show more confidence, no egos. Most kids, teens and especially adults will come to BJJ to decompress after a hard day. It helps manage a person’s emotions.
This is where C2 Martial Arts (Legion 13) is so important. Legion 13, our headquarters means an army of warriors. At C2MA we create a safe place for students to do self defence and learn martial arts in a structured environment. Self defence is paramount in today’s society. Martial arts teach children many life skills, not just self defence. It’s obvious we can’t stop bullying, the effects can be soul destroying, but as parents we can give our children the confidence they need to use their body as a weapon if they need to. Parenting requires us to educate our children, on how to deal with bullies, with compassion and wisdom. A martial artist will know how to do this, reacting to a dangerous situation quickly and efficiently.
“When you react, you don’t give your mind the time to get filled with emotions. You are devoid of anger, fear, and frustration; you are simply moving.” – Saulo Ribeiro